Understanding Guilt and Shame: A Counselor’s Perspective

By Sandra I. Beekmann, MS, NCC, LCMHC

As a mental health counselor, I often sit with clients who carry heavy feelings of guilt and shame. These emotions can feel overwhelming, and while they are both natural human experiences, they affect us in very different ways. Learning to understand and separate them is an important step toward healing and self-compassion.

The Difference Between Guilt and Shame

Guilt is the feeling we get when we believe we have done something wrong or failed to live up to our values. It’s focused on behavior: “I made a mistake.” Guilt, when processed in a healthy way, can be useful. It helps us reflect, repair, and make different choices in the future.

Shame, on the other hand, cuts deeper. It’s not about what we did—it’s about who we are. Shame says: “I am the mistake.” When people internalize shame, it can lead to feelings of unworthiness, isolation, and self-blame. Unlike guilt, shame rarely motivates positive change. Instead, it often keeps us stuck in cycles of self-criticism.

How Guilt and Shame Show Up

Many of us learn from a young age to equate mistakes with being “bad.” Over time, this can create patterns of self-judgment that impact our relationships, career, and even our physical health. Some common ways guilt and shame may appear include:

• Over-apologizing or feeling responsible for things outside of your control.

• Avoiding situations where you fear judgment.

• Negative self-talk or a harsh inner critic.

• Struggling to set boundaries because of fear of disappointing others.

Moving Toward Healing

The good news is that guilt and shame don’t have to define you. With support, reflection, and practice, you can begin to shift the way you relate to these emotions. Some helpful steps include:

• Self-Compassion: Treat yourself with the same kindness you would offer a loved one.

• Separating Self from Behavior: Remind yourself, “I made a mistake, but I am not a mistake.”

• Talking About It: Shame thrives in secrecy. Sharing your feelings with a trusted friend, therapist, or support group can help release its power.

• Reframing Guilt: If guilt is pointing you toward change, use it as an opportunity for growth rather than punishment.

A Final Word

Both guilt and shame are part of the human experience, but they don’t have to control your life. If you find yourself weighed down by these emotions, know that you are not alone—and that healing is possible. Counseling can provide a safe, nonjudgmental space to explore these feelings and learn new ways to approach them with compassion. Contact us today 813.335.97.94 or office@smctampa.com

Wellness Benefits of a Yoga Practice

By Jade Caswell, MA, LMHC

            In an age where more people are looking for alternate wellness practices to manage mental stress and physical ailments, yoga offers a world of benefits. This ages-old practice, with roots in Ancient India, promotes mind-body connection and present moment awareness (mindfulness). Yoga can be practiced almost anywhere and be tailored to any fitness level or body type. At Sana Mente Counseling, we are passionate about creating a customized treatment plan for clients, and frequently encourage the use of alternative healing practices, (such as yoga, acupuncture or breath work!) to promote total wellness. Read more below about the benefits of yoga:

1. Reduces Stress

Yoga has been demonstrated to reduce cortisol levels in the body. When cortisol levels are heightened over a long-period of time, the body is more susceptible to illness and fatigue. Yoga helps to lower cortisol and promote homeostasis, leading to a sense of balance and harmony in the body.

2. Improves Cognitive Function

Meditation and mindful movement promote increased focus, mental clarity and attention, and can help reduce brain fatigue and burnout.

3. Reduces Symptoms of Depression

Yoga can be effective in combatting symptoms of depression, and when paired with other treatments such as psychotherapy and medication, can significantly improve symptoms of both anxiety and depression.

4. Strengths the Immune System

By increasing circulation and reducing inflammation in the body, yoga can promote a healthy immune system.

5. Improves Flexibility and Strength

Many yoga poses (such as plank, warrior, or crow pose) help build core and muscle strength, while also enhancing flexibility in the body.

6. Combats Chronic Pain

Yoga has also been demonstrated to alleviate chronic pain and support digestive and respiratory health.

Interested in building a wellness plan that is tailored to you? Please call us today at 813-335-9794!

Benefits of Group Therapy

By Jade Caswell, MA, LMHC

            When most people think of attending therapy, they often think of attending individual or perhaps couples therapy, however, group counseling can be another effective therapy model to promote change and self-growth. Groups may have different focuses and techniques, however, a few of the most common include support, psychoeducational, process oriented and skills building groups. The topics for groups can be endless, however, example topics include social skill building, addiction and eating disorder recovery, or grief support groups. Read more about the numerous benefits of group therapy below!

1. Enhanced Accountability

- During the group process, group members agree on goals and seek to hold members accountable for progress towards a goal. Group members can also be called on to provide supportive feedback for other group members.

2. Normalizing Group Members' Experiences

- The group setting naturally combats isolation, shame and stigma. Members may feel less alone and part of a community.

3. Cost Effective

- Group therapy can be more affordable than individual therapy because the cost is shared among members. This can make it a more accessible option.

4. Learning from Others

- Group therapy can be a great place to discover new ways of coping or taking new perspectives on a particular issue.

5. Safe Space for Vulnerability

- A group setting allows for testing of new behaviors and responses without the potential judgement of a 'real world' setting. For example, this gives members a chance to practice vulnerability and sharing feeling, thoughts, etc in a safe environment.

Group therapy is a powerful tool for change. Are you ready to take the next step in your mental health journey? SMC offers a wide variety of group therapy topics, including a men's mental health support group, hormonal wellness group, BIPOC and postpartum support groups. Interested in joining? Please call us today at 813-335-9794. We look forward to hearing from you!